According to Wikipedia: "...[Jai Ho] means "Freedom to Thee". It can also mean 'Praise', 'Hail' or 'Hallelujah'. When translated directly into hindi, 'jai' means 'prayer' or 'pray.' 'Jai ho' is usually said collectively during and at the end of prayers... A.R. Rahman [has] stated [at a performance on "The Oprah Winfrey Show"] "Jai Ho" means 'May Victory be Yours'."
Although I love the song for its optimistic beat and encouraging lyrics, if I hear another princessy, "I Love Anime and other foreign pop culture" little girl say when I say "Jai Ho", "Oh my god, I love that song!" I will seriously hit them over the head and tell them to get a fucking clue.
Reason why I am saying Jai Ho: I have been ranked #5 in the Library Page competition, I mean, job. Now, I thought that was pretty awesome! I mean, shoot, I'm number five in a 800 number candidate list! But then I was warned that there are multiple people in one ranking. So, I'm not as optimistic about it all. There could be a hundred people in the number one ranking. There could be ten people in front of me in the fifth ranking. So, yes, I am happy that I got a pretty good score. But not optimistic that I will be called in next week for an instant-hire interview.
Work: I have been taking up more shifts at work this past week because my supervisor is on vacation until next Thursday. Now, that's great for me because I got a raise recently and now I have a few more hours to incure more money. But it has definitely been exhausting. I forgot how it was to wake up every morning at the same time, and going home to have to do it again. My body loves to be lazy, but I am definitely going to whip it into shape. I mean, come on, I will be going to school and going to work! It will have to get used to be tired.
What has been irritating me this past week though is the fact that my work sharing partner just doesn't have the same work ethic as me. It's something that I am trying to reconcile my brain to understand that not everyone can be the same as me. My work ethic is that I come in and do the best that I can, and if my boss needs me I am always there to help out. Like in this case, I am willing to sacrifice my days off to come in all day to help out and do Jasmin's work. My work sharing partner isn't like that. She comes in irregularly, or doesn't come in at all. And so I have had to be Jazznifer (combination of Jasmin's job and my job), and that has added to my exhaustion. Now, I could just not do Jasmin's job. But my boss wouldn't let me do that. She gives me both job's work because the other Jennifer isn't there. But that is just life. I chose to come in on my days off and take care of everything. I chose to earn extra money. The other Jennifer chose not to. I've been irritated that this has happened, but I am trying to reconcile that we have free will and that she chose to not give a good gosh darn about the office and choose to do whatever the hell she wants. I wish I could do that. Maybe that's why I am irritated: my brain just won't let me do that. If I did, I would start to feel guilt and start to think that I am not a good worker.
But then again, because of this work ethic, I got a raise. I got recognition. So, that means something, right? Maybe I shouldn't be envious of her work ethic because one doesn't get rewarded for that type of work?
Or maybe not.
On my love life: I have heard some have wanted an update on my love life. Well, it's been pretty stagnant lately. I was supposed to have a first date with one woman last Sunday, but it was cancelled because she had unexpected plans the day before. We haven't rescheduled. I have been debating whether I should text/call her to see if she would like to reschedule, but I also know that the ball is really in her court. She is more busy than me because of school, so I don't want to come off as somewhat needy. So, we will see. If I don't hear back from her in the next two weeks, I will contact her and see.
I do have a first date with another woman next Saturday. It's just a coffee date, and I am not expecting much. We've been corresponding through email for some months, and finally decided to meet. The thing is she lives further away (San Jose/Monterey area), and we don't have a lot in common. We have some, but maybe not enough to build anything from it. But we will see. The thing is, she sent me an email right before I started getting really busy at work. Now, when I get really busy at work, I have no desire to turn on my computer. And although my phone has the capacity to write an email back, I don't like to write long emails (which is what she and I tend to do in emails) on my phone. So, I didn't write to her for almost a week. I sent her an email, but she hasn't sent one back. It could be she's really busy as well, so I'm not that worried. But it could be that she didn't particularly like the fact that I didn't respond as quickly as I used to. But ah well.
Other then that, my love life has been the usual nothing-is-happening. Maybe it's because I've been pretty busy with work (and possible jobs) and starting school, but I just haven't had the desire to date. Is that weird? I'll go through periods where I would definitely like to be in a partnership, but then I'll slowly just not care and like being single. It's like a mood swing.
Other: I decided to not count for the past week and a half. It's really hard to count points when you have birthdays upon birthdays and then try to compile lunch for the busy day. I am going to start counting this Monday, but it feels good to just be free. I haven't gone too crazy. I've been keeping to small portions, just not caring about whether it is low calorie or not. Although I did go on a baking fringe. And I had Val's (great burger joint) last night. But I didn't eat fried fish when my parent's wanted fish and chips (I had Teriyaki shrimp instead). And when I ate fried chicken last Sunday, I felt absolutely sick (hence why I didn't eat fried fish the next time). I used to think that I wouldn't be able to stop eating fried foods. Now I just can't possibly think about it or I will get sick.
Stupid Weight Watchers. You ruined my joy of fried foods. But you will never ruin my love for chocolate! And peanut butter!
Which, reminds me, I found a great low fat peanut butter spread. Called Better N' Peanut Butter, and it tastes really good. It has that good smokey flavor that you miss out on Jiffy and Skippy (I always taste the sugar in those...), and it makes a great Peanut Butter sandwich. It was recommended by Hungry Girl, and Trader Joe's provides it. That makes it a good find to me. If I can find it at Trader Joe's rather then Safeway, it means it's a great find.
That's about it. I've been really stir crazy lately, so I've been rearranging my room. I would like the free space to go to a bird or some other cool pet, but I don't see that in the near future. Although I take care of my responsibilities and didn't kill their fish, my parents still won't let me bring in a nice, furry(or feathery) friend. Some day. Some day...
