"Eat Pray Love"

When I first read "Eat Pray Love", it was during a time in my life when things just didn't make sense for me. I had been struggling for three years to get my footing after college, and I was realizing that what I wanted wasn't actually what I wanted. I had thought I was taking a chance, but actually I was going down the road that others had wanted for me. So when I read this book, it opened up my eyes to ideas and thoughts that I never thought I could have before. I took out of it the idea of risking everything to find wholeness. After I read that book, I was inspired to find myself as well through risking everything and doing my own path. I quit the job that I absolutely hated. I applied for the Library and Information Science graduate course. I risked everything in order to find my true self.

Well, the movie just came out. I wasn't as excited to see the movie because I don't trust Hollywood when it comes to book adaptations. I was willing to give the movie a try. Not many people wanted to see it with me, so on Sunday I went to my local theater and had a "me" date.

I didn't realize how moved I could be by that movie. It struck a chord that I didn't realize was inside of me. It also brought a lot of emotions up to the surface that I had been trying to keep deep inside me. So I have decided to read it again. But I am reading it in a whole different angle. It is helping with my heartbreak. Helping me open my eyes about my latest relationship and just really helping me bring closure to it all. But I wasn't ready to have this flood of emotion come over me just yet. A lot of anger and bitterness that I had been trying to keep at bay. I am trying not to dwell on it and let it pass, but it has been hard this week. But I am moving forward, letting the emotions ride and then hopefully fall away.

I am also trying to face it with a healthy attitude instead of how I was before. I was realizing that I was trying to not deal with it all with wine, so I am trying not to drink as much wine as I was before. I don't believe I am an alcoholics (they go to meetings), but I do believe I was dealing with everything with an unhealthy attitude. I think the movie and the book is helping me finally come to terms with everything I was trying to hide and bury inside of me.

It is still going to be a rough battle. Although it is helpful to read the book again and find inspiration again, I am still working it all out. But I am confident now that everything will be all right.

Yes, that's right. Everything will be all right.