Saturday was the 2nd year anniversary of my friend's death.
The lyric from Brandi Carlile's song, "This Year" still rings true: "He said, I forgive you...I said, I hate you..."
I still get so angry at him. Although he and I weren't close, I still get so angry that he couldn't just see that other people loved him.
I guess it will take 10 years before this will not feel like a stabbing pain. That I won't blame myself. He said he was tired that night. He said he was okay, but just tired. I should have known that something was wrong. I should have known that he wasn't okay.
Again, I think it will take 10 years...
The travails and gallavantings of an Asian queer lady who loves to read, write, and create havoc.
1 comment:
It seems that time heals all wounds, but it takes loooots of time. I don't even know if 10 years is a good number. Don't blame yourself; not for still thinking about it, not for thinking you could've done more. You were a friend that did her best; I can't imagine how sad/frustrating this must feel, though.
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