Where It All Falls Into Place

I GOT INTO SAN JOSE STATE UNIVERSITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yay!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, enough screaming. :)

I am now an official Graduate Student for Library Sciences. I don't have to say, "I'm still waiting..." or "I may be getting into..." No. I AM a graduate student in Library Sciences. And it feels GRREEEAAAAATTTT!

Ever since October, I have constantly been saying, "I am putting my life back into order." And ever since then I have been taking care of me; I have nursed myself out of a nervous breakdown and won the battle. It just has not shown in true physical results. I had a lot of naysayers that say I am just sitting on my laurels. They keep telling me that I am lazy (hmmm...wonder who they could be?). But I told them, "Patience. You will see." I had to keep telling myself, "Patience. You will see. This is good." And I did. I had patience. That's what I have been learning through this whole entire adventure is patience. And because I waited patiently for the results, I found that the results are everything that I have imagined it could be.

Because I waited, I am:
1.) going back to school for my graduate degree
2.) going to work at the library (cross your fingers still! I only found out that the test is the ONLY thing they are "grading" me now. Before it was 50% written 50% oral. Now it's all written. Which is good because I rocked that test).
3.) lost 12 lbs in one month.
and 4.) not going to give up on my dating life and be a hermit.

Okay, the fourth one I am still working patience on. I just found out that the tea date girl isn't as interested with me as I am with her. I am too feminine looking for her. But we had a good rapport, so I am hoping we can still be friends. The thing that I didn't like is the first thing that I thought was, "God, that means I'm too ugly." And I don't want to think that. And I instantly wanted to blame myself and say, "To hell to this vicious dating world." But I'm not. I am going to stand up to this impatient person in me and say, "Patience! You will see." And, yes, I know I will have more results if I stop "looking". But that doesn't mean someone will fall into my lap in my room randomly one day. I have to be active. I am not going to go to clubs and hook up with everyone. I am just going to have patience; someone is out there that can handle ME. :)

And that's what I'm holding on to. I don't want to be sad that I'm too feminine for someone. I want to be happy that I was smart enough to get into San Jose State. I want to be happy that I am finally getting my life back together. So that is what I will be happy about.

Yaaaaayyyy!!!!!!! :-D